This week I was planning on writing about Mercury Retrograde (which started yesterday), but that changed this morning. So here we go.
**A little back story for those that don’t know me. Back in 2005 my Mom died unexpectedly on March 7th at the age of 53 and her funeral was on March 10th which is my Dad’s birthday (he died in 2001 of colon cancer)**
Truth time: Today has been tough (I've been up since 3am). No idea why some years around this time are harder than others, but they are and this year seems to be one of them. Which is surprising because the holidays were not that difficult last year. Or maybe that is why the first of March is hard this year. The Universe gave me a pleasant holiday season in 2018 in exchange for a shitty first part of March 2019. If memory serves me correct, my holidays in 2017 were beyond terrible but my first of March in 2018 was great. I digress….
On the way to school this morning my mind was running 90 to nothing thinking about how crappy things are this time of year, how hard it was to climb out of bed this morning, yadda yadda. Then my son randomly says "Mom, today is a new day to try again". Wow. Mega truth bomb from the Universe/my Spirit Guides/God/What have you. So, let that sink in for a minute. Today is a new day to try again.
TODAY IS A NEW DAY TO TRY AGAIN.
Now, I’m not a big rah-rah motivational poster person. However, you know what? My old soul, little man is right. Today IS a new day to try again. Each day is a brand new day to start over and try to accomplish what we didn't yesterday. The key word is TRY. I always tell my son that, when it comes to school and his work, the most important thing is that he try his best. The same thing applies to us and life. The most important thing is that we try. Life doesn’t have to be Pinterest perfect. The important thing is that we keep going and we keep trying. Remember: it may be a winding, twisting, hilly journey with random fire swamps, but we always come out on the other side.
Now I’m not going to sit here and say getting out of bed and trying again is easy, because it’s not. Getting up out of bed some days is the hardest thing you’ll do. However, we do it because staying in bed, for most of us, is not an option. Kids have to get to school, we have to get to work, etc. **Disclaimer: Now, don’t get me wrong, I know that there are people out there with legit depression who literally cannot get out of bed; I’ve been there and done that. While this applies to you in a way too, this is also a judgement free zone. You do what you have to do to heal, even if that is staying in bed all day.**
One of the biggest lessons I learned after my Mom died was that no matter what we are feeling, the world keeps moving and spinning. It doesn’t stop to give us time to grieve and/or heal. I wish it would. How nice would that be to be able to hit the pause button on life long enough to get our shit together? Then once shit has been put back together we could hit resume. However, I also wonder, for some at least, if that would make the problem worse instead of better.
Take me, for example, if I was able to hit the pause button, I would probably never hit the resume button. Come to think of it, I actually did do that for awhile after my Mom died. I hit the pause button right after she died and it stayed paused for about 6 weeks. I stayed with family in Tennessee during that time and tried to heal. However, it was around the end of April that I realized that hitting that pause button almost made things worse instead of better. Bills piled up, I still had her stuff to go through, I had to get back to work, etc. I also realized that leaving it paused would make things better and that I had to get back to living. The way we get back to living is with coping mechanisms.
Everyone has different coping mechanisms and most of us use a combination of those mechanisms. Some of us can just flip a switch and move on (at least for that day). Some of us need counseling, medicine, a friend support system, etc. None of these mechanisms are wrong or bad, just different (remember judge-free zone because I’ve used quite a few). **Another disclaimer: some coping mechanisms can cause other problems, so choose your mechanism wisely.**
It would be so nice if we all could just flip that switch, but it’s okay if we can’t. It’s okay to ask for help and to seek help. All of our brains are wired differently. We are literally all different people. What works for me will, most likely, not work for you. What works for you, most likely won’t work for the person down the block. The important thing is that we keep striving toward what works best for us and we keep trying.
Trying to eat healthy & exercise and failed miserable yesterday? Today is a new day to try again.
Stayed in bed because it was just too hard to move and get up? Today is a new day to try again.
Trying to quit smoking and smoked half a pack yesterday? Today is a new day to try again.
Keep trying. It does better. I promise.
